Forgiveness through Faith can Save Marriages!

Forgiveness

I’ve dealt with a lot of forgiveness issues from my past and present as I’m sure many you have. Whether I am having trouble forgiving myself, a stranger or someone close to me one thing remains the same. I am a prisoner of my own lack of forgiveness. As some of you following my blog may know I’ve had a few marital problems and they mostly stem from lack of forgiveness. I can also safely say I haven’t taken a lot of responsibility for my part in what I like to refer to as what seemed to be a smorgasbord of problems between the two of us.

Through my ongoing study of God’s word, other blogs involving Christian wives and their roles, for example “Unveiled Wife” which I definitely recommend, and related articles I have realized something. What looked to be the downfall of my marriage actually is turning out to be what is saving not only my marriage itself but restoring a very broken relationship my husband and I had with our Savior!

Let me explain. When my husband and I entered our marriage we were completely oblivious to the roles our Father had set forth for us thousands of years ago. Needless to say we were trying to build our foundation on sand and it was not long before we began to crumble. We were sliding down that very slippery path of destruction that leads to the dead end of marriage called divorce. I lost almost all hope and in my mind there was no going back. I had held on to so much hurt and score keeping that I didn’t know which way was up. Yet there on my path lied such a battle of conflict.

On my path there were all these voices telling me that I didn’t deserve this pain, I was an independent woman, and that I was still young so I could move on easily. Voices telling me that if I forgave for whatever wrongdoing that I felt had been done against me then I was somehow admitting defeat. My anger was consuming me. I was letting this anger control me so that I wouldn’t forgive. I didn’t want to forgive. I had a choice to make. I finally started asking for God to softened my heart because I knew my heart had grew so cold.

All these confusing voices in my head were not coming from the Lord. God is not the author of confusion and we need to let that sink in our brains and let God take over. As my Pastor said best, “Our newness in Christ should begin and take place in our homes first!”

So I prayed and prayed and God gave me an entirely new path. This path is paved with beautiful, unconditional, forgiving love that only God himself can show us. I had been holding on to grudges yet rejoicing in all the forgiveness my Lord could give me the instant I accepted HIM as my Lord and Savior.

To Forgive The Undeserving Is To Show Grace…

I had been told by many to pray for the ones who hurt me as well as myself. So I prayed. I prayed for his heart and I prayed for my heart and I strived for sincerity. It did not happen in my timing but in HIS timing I finally saw hope entering back into my mind and heart.

Slowly my anger melted away like snow melting off the sun kissed pedals of a flower on the first day of Spring. God loves marriage. He does not want to see his children divorcing. Where there is a will, there is a way and if you don’t have that will pray for the Lord to restore that will in you. I am here telling you that I’ve seen the brink of divorce but it doesn’t have to end there!

Do you remember when you were on fire for the Lord? You went shouting on every mountain top that you love Jesus and you’re not ashamed to tell it to anyone willing to hear you. Then maybe after a few months or years your fire starts to dwindle down. You may still go to Church but you just don’t witness like you use to or feel the Holy Spirit every time you pray. Same things happen to people who are married. The love is new and exciting in the beginning but may become comfortable or casual after a while.

If that sounds like you then I encourage you to re-evaluate your relationship with your savior and see what you can do to improve your servant’s heart for the Lord every day. We should strive to implement this intentional behavior in our marriages as well. If we cannot stay committed to someone we can touch, feel, see and love physically as well as benefit from physically than how is the Lord to trust that we can stay committed to our relationship with him? This is why I believe the Lord holds marriage so close to HIS heart.

Pray daily my friends and seek Christian counseling from older married members of your church, your pastor, and most importantly your bible! React in love, patience and forgiveness. If you or your spouse are full of anger look to your Word. Do what the word asks and pray every day for God to guide you through. Remember faith as small as a mustard can move mountains! My husband and I are moving our mountain together by the grace of God. You can too!

Sincerely,
4rm Partygirl to Praying Woman

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. ~Ephesians 4:32

 

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50 thoughts on “Forgiveness through Faith can Save Marriages!

  1. Pingback: How I “lost” everything… | 4Rm Partygirl To Praying Woman

  2. “Two good forgivers” – that quote is so very right! Isn’t it though? I’ve become such a laid back person after meeting my husband. I forgive much easily now.

    • Me too!! Before I met my husband the words “I’m sorry” rarely ever left my lips and when it did it was like pulling teeth. Thank God for growth! Thanks for sharing.

    • I am so glad you were able to relate. Its such a comforting feeling to know the things we go through other people are experiencing as well.

    • Thank you. Commitment definitely is key. I once asked an older friend of mine what her secret to a lasting marriage as she had just celebrated their 40th anniversary. She said one word, commitment. It was such an eye opening conversation!

    • Thank you. I pray this post encourages you. I know how amazing it feels to receive forgiveness which makes me want to forgive more easily now. Be patient with yourself as well. Some things to time and intentional thinking. God bless.

    • It took me many years to to learn how to take responsibility for my part in things. Its definitely progress and progress gives me hope. Thank you for stopping by.

    • This is why I am so thankful for the opportunity to connect with those who have or are going through what I’ve experienced. Forgiveness is very vital, yes! Thank you for sharing.

    • Thank you. While we still experience difficulties in this life like everyone else there is a joy between us that we’ve never had before and a bond that I feel God is holding together for us. 🙂

  3. This was such a great read. I’m getting married in February and we’ve been taking classes at our church that focus a lot on forgiveness and understanding each other.

    • Thank you! That is so great to hear, congratulations!!! Sounds like y’all are off to a great start. 🙂 Wish my husband and I could’ve done the same thing. Maybe it would have saved us from some long, painful nights or maybe not. We are both stubborn natured people, lol. Forgiveness and understand are such powerful lessons to learn. Once these abilities are mastered life somehow seems so much more joyous and simple. I am thankful that God is showing us the path. Praying God continues to guide you through your beautiful journey. 🙂

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